My oldest works in a hardware store on the weekends, and on Sundays his boss buys lunch for the whole crew. This Sunday they ordered Chinese food and when he came home from work, he shared his fortune with me:
I think I already established that I am a fan of revelations and while I suddenly had a real craving for a fortune cookie, I also had a bit of a revelation. It's true - my kids supply valuable information, I learn a lot from them.
While I have learned how much it takes to make me completely lose my shit on several occasions, there is one lesson that sticks out in particular.
My kids taught me how strong I actually am.
When my son was three years old, we went to an indoor waterpark. While playing in the kiddie pool with me, he slipped and fell onto the back of his head. The impact nearly knocked him out and when I ran to pick him up I could tell it was bad. He was conscious, but his eyes rolled to the back of his head. He wasn't screaming, just whimpering - and it scared the shit out of me.
I had always imagined that I would totally break down if one of my kids ever got hurt.
But I didn't.
I stayed calm and asked one of the life guards to call an ambulance. It did not take long for them to arrive and we were taken into an office where they examined Marius and told us that his skull wasn't fractured, but he probably had a concussion. By that time he had already started throwing up and slipping in and out of consciousness.
My husband held Marius while I quickly got rid of my wet bathing suit, then I jumped into the ambulance with him and my husband and daughter followed in our car.
Marius was unconscious for most of the 20 min. ride to the hospital and I'm pretty sure that this was the only time I ever rode in a car "facing backwards" without throwing up myself.
Once we got to the ER they did a CAT Scan and a doctor confirmed that it wasn't just a concussion. The impact had pushed his brain to the front hard enough, that he was bleeding internally. In his brain. I remember hearing the words and not really hearing them at the same time. I already had visions of doctors drilling holes into my son's skull to relieve the pressure - but thankfully that was not necessary.
Marius and I spent the night in the ICU, and a nurse came once an hour to check his vitals. He was unconscious the whole night, but his vitals were good and his pupils were reacting as they should and by early morning the doctor gave the green light to have him moved to the children's wing for a few more days of observation.
This was definitely a time in my life when I learned that I can do what needs to be done and get through it. It doesn't mean that I worry less or that I'm not afraid - I'm still working on that. I was right next to him and could not keep him from getting hurt and while I know in my head that I can't control everything, and in my heart that I will get through whatever happens - I need a lesson in not-worrying and being more in the moment.
Maybe my puppy child can teach me that one?
Now tell me - what's something you have learned from your kids?